Missing You

image

I miss my husband. I do. I can’t help it. It will be another two or three weeks before he comes home. I knew this life wouldn’t be easy, I know it is all worth it-but I can’t help but be down sometimes, to feel lonely.

I love our long talks. I hate when we lose cell service. I love our video chats with the kids. I hate the little things he misses. Like one of the kids learning something new.

As hard as it can be, I am so thankful. I am grateful for my husband’s strong work ethic. I am thankful for the stability this career promises our family- I’m grateful for the future we have because of it.

I try my best to stay positive and not let myself get too down. But sometines, I have to let it out. It’s hard, and I miss him. But it’s worth it.

Advertisements

A Busy Sunday Funday

image

Good morning all! We have a whole lot going on over the next few weeks including several doctors appointments (some for me, and some for the kids), meetings, and house hunting(we need more room!). Busy busy we are!

Knowing how nuts everything is going to be for a while, I decided this weekend I would use Sunday to get prepared-as best I can anyway. Meal prepping, laundry, and overall household organization are my missions for the day. I spent Friday and Saturday gathering supplies-though I still managed to forget a couple things lol but no worries I will make a run back to the store for the last necessary essentials.

Later I  will be dedicating a whole post to the slow cooker freezer meals I have selected (how-to, supplies, recipes, etc.), and then a post geared toward my household organization, which will include some purging, reselling, and donating.

Very excited to share all of this with you guys! Please stay tuned!

Wisdom Teeth and A New Road

image

Well I disappeared for a little while I know. My apologies. For those of you who have kept visiting my page and liking my statuses on facebook and twitter I greatly appreciate it.

I just had all four of my wisdom teeth extracted -not so much fun really, but it did afford me a teeny tiny break from my usual SAHM routine. I got to nap all day afterwards! Woohoo! Yea baby! lol I haven’t done that since I had that horrific stomach flu a few months ago-and that was no picnic. But this little surgery, that was kind of, well, nice. They knocked me out for the removal, and loaded me up with the necessary pain meds to manage once I got home. Honestly, stiffness and some slight swelling is all I have had to complain about post-op. I’m on the mend.

Meanwhile, all of my children are having some sort of evil sinus crud- thankfully no fevers though! Admittedly I am tired but we’re making it, and their cute little runny noses are slowly drying up. My husband has been on the road for over two weeks now and most likely won’t be home for another two at least. I really do appreciateĀ him and all that he does but sometimes I just really wish I could take a break. No kids for a day you know. I love them so much, of course but I’m really wearing down here. Despite my father in law and cousins efforts to help when they can I really feel like I am just drowning in isolation, but this time alone has really given me a chance to reflect on a lot that I have been dealing with, for years now to be honest with you. I am not going to get in to a lot of it right now but I have decided to seek help from my doctor.

I’ve fought against anxiety, attention issues, and hyperactivity since I was a kid. These things have only gotten worse as I have gotten older and had children. I’m finding that I can no longer manage them on my own. I do need help, and after talking to my husband and my mother I am going outside of my comfort zone to talk to my doctor. It’s a start at least. I need to get to the bottom of these issues and learn how to manage them as an adult with children.

I am certain I do not have post partum depression but I know something isn’t right-it hasn’t been right since long before the kids were born. I have had serious reservations about speaking to an outside party-I’m so afraid that I’ll be judged, or labeled, or even scoffed at. I don’t want that but I know that it’s time to talk to someone. Something I probably should have done years ago.

Please bare with me on this new road. I’m not certain what lies ahead but I am positive about my direction. As I learn more about myself I hope that I can share it with all of you and perhaps even help some of those that have been experiencing similar issues.